Ever wonder what motivates me when I do something? What keeps the motor ticking relentlessly for miles and miles on a downcast day? To me, the answer is very simple, my emotions.
I am not an emotional person, I don't like to go ballistic just because some bitch in school ticked me off, but emotion it is that keeps me going. Perhaps keeping it all in does play a part though. By not channelling it through conventional means i.e. mope around in self pity, flood Penang with tears, thrash a classroom, dance around naked, I think I might have found an alternative means of powering my endeavours.
Case in point, I have been quite disappointed with a multitude of issues lately. So I did what I usually do for therapy, run till I drop. However, when I am usually in a funk, I don't have much energy, so dropping usually happens within the first 20 minutes or so, or the first tough part of my course. I was expecting more or less the same with my current disappointment, perhaps worse since I have been very down. But the more I ran, the more the anger and disappointment built up, and before I knew it, I had already coasted my way to a 10 km run.
It's not uncommon for people to work their socks off when they are under the red mist, but it is a stimulant with an edge. Rage and emotion are usually accompanied by hurried decisions and mistakes. However, running as a 'dumb' sport, where the only thing you need to do is travel from point A to point B in as short a time as possible, makes pure emotion a viable source of motivation. Motivation that should be tapped instead of controlled.
Anyway, I am just fucking pissed now.
2 comments:
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thx dude.
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